Kevin Duboe Talks Fitness & Growth: Discipline Beyond the Gym

What drives someone to leave college and leap into real estate at 19? How does cutting ties with the past fuel personal transformation?

In this episode, I'm thrilled to sit down with Kevin Duboe, a mortgage lender and fitness aficionado. Originally hailing from Argentina, Kevin's journey to the U.S. is a story of embracing opportunities and diving headfirst into the world of sports, competition, and entrepreneurship.

We dive deep into how fitness has been a cornerstone in Kevin's personal development. He shares the tough choices he's made, like walking away from old friends to align with people who truly lift him up. Kevin opens up about his decision-making process and how self-awareness has played a massive role in his growth.

But it's not all serious talk – Kevin brings in some amazing insights into the importance of daily habits and routines in not just building muscle but also self-confidence and trust. He makes a compelling case for investing in yourself, both in the gym and your finances, to carve out a life that's not only successful but deeply satisfying.

Kevin's story is a testament to change – from a young immigrant finding his feet in a new country to a successful real estate entrepreneur. His discipline and thirst for personal development are truly inspiring. Whether he's skydiving, flying planes, or closing loans, Kevin's all about living life to the fullest.

Kevin's journey is nothing short of extraordinary. Arriving in the U.S. from Argentina, he quickly embraced sports and competition. Although he started in college unsure of his path, real estate called out to him, leading him to leave college at 19 and dive into this dynamic field. After several successful years as a realtor and now a respected loan officer, Kevin’s passion for real estate continues to grow.

A true believer in discipline and personal development, Kevin lives a life full of health, adrenaline, and adventure. He’s now channeling his entrepreneurial spirit into a new venture in real estate wholesaling, aiming to serve and inspire others in the industry he loves.

Key Takeaways:
Fitness is a great starting point for personal development and can build momentum for growth in other areas of life.
Making decisions and cutting off certain things in life is necessary for personal transformation.
Daily habits and routines are essential for building self-confidence and trust.
Investing in mentors and coaches can fast-track personal growth and development.
Self-awareness and self-reflection are crucial for identifying and overcoming limiting beliefs and self-sabotage.

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Transcript

[TRANSCRIPT]

0:00:00 - (Kevin Duboe): Fitness is, like, a great way to start if, like, you don't know where to start, don't worry about finances. Like, just keep the promises to yourself and treat your body right. And, like, that already will build enough momentum to lead you into other areas.

0:00:13 - (Tawni Nguyen): In life, because that's something that people don't talk about. It's one of the rejections, because they're like, oh, just get over and do it. But I never actually considered relistening to your calls, and you went through, like, the fucking extreme turret calls. You listened to them. And it's a really nice way to frame self awareness, is that you have to study yourself in a way. Right? Like, that's how you develop self awareness, because there is, like, a road to self mastery is first understanding yourself, and you're just so calm and collected that it's almost like a serial murder vibe.

0:00:44 - (Kevin Duboe): I love it.

0:00:48 - (Tawni Nguyen): Hey, welcome back to the Fit n Frugal podcast. I am your host, Tawni Nguyen. So, today, I'm super excited in this new series I have here with my friend Kevin. Kevin Duboe, right?

0:00:59 - (Kevin Duboe): Yes. Kevin Duboe. Wait, is this the other it?

0:01:04 - (Tawni Nguyen): Did I get the wrong. Where's your brother? That would be funny. If we do the next.

0:01:10 - (Kevin Duboe): Exactly.

0:01:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): Which one are they? Yeah. So, Kevin, you are a mortgage.

0:01:16 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah. Mortgage lender.

0:01:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): Mortgage lender by day, Batman by night. That kind of deal.

0:01:20 - (Kevin Duboe): Exactly. Is that what Tanner said? He told me that before. Yeah, mortgage lender. That's pretty much all I do. And then I live a very healthy, fit lifestyle, so I like to show that type of content, as well.

0:01:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I think the last time we were talking about just how to live, like, a holistically healthy and wealthy life, it kind of comes down to breaking that first barrier of growth, and that barrier comes with a lot of judgment and losing friends and just people kind of looking at you like you're better than me because you're choosing to do better.

0:01:57 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:01:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): I think that's one of the topic that I found really profound. It's just in that conversation, because I think a lot of people that want to change their life, kind of. That's their first, I don't know, stepping stone into the world of self development. I don't like the word self help.

0:02:11 - (Kevin Duboe): But, yeah, it's personal development at the end of the day. And it's kind of funny that you mentioned that. I like to journal, and I felt like I was hesitating in certain areas of my life, and I researched what hesitation is, and it's like, what's the opposite of hesitation? Is decision making a decision. And really, the latin root of decision is to cut off. So whenever we do have to make a change and we decide to do something else for our lives, that means we also have to cut off certain things in our life. And that can usually be friends or can usually be vices or certain things we have to let go of in order to really go on that path. Change.

0:02:49 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. What was the hardest and biggest thing that you had to cut off for you to be on this path?

0:02:56 - (Kevin Duboe): It's a good question. When I first kind of started this journey, I was 19 when I left college and decided to go into, like, real estate and mortgages, I think at that point. And it was like just letting go of a lot of friends because at that time, you're 20 years old in college and most people are, like, partying and wanting to have fun and do all this stuff, and I just had to change that whole dynamic.

0:03:19 - (Kevin Duboe): So I think that was hard, but to me, it was also worth it at the same time. But it was hard. I think it's always hard because I never want to hurt other people's really feelings or because of if I care about them. Just because I'm doing something else doesn't mean I don't stop caring about you.

0:03:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): Did you feel like you lost a little bit of your sense of identity as well when you had to let go of some of those things?

0:03:46 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, for sure, because I was more like an athlete growing up. So all my friends, same thing, and then everybody else is a separate click, essentially. They have their own way of doing things. So, like, me having to go a different path, which luckily, I had my twin brother with me. So we kind of, at the same time, decided to do our own thing in real estate and mortgages, and that definitely helped.

0:04:11 - (Kevin Duboe): But, yeah, it is hard. Looking back now, you can see these are just like, what has to happen whenever you're changing an identity or you're changing yourself. Ed, Mila likes to talk about is like, when you change your identity, it's also like you're changing your inner friends as well in order to match what you're looking to achieve or go for.

0:04:33 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, because I think David Meltzer, I just saw a video that he was talking about, let's just say if you're at base camp five and there's people below you and there's people above you can't. It just depends on how your perspective on it, because the people that's trying to reach out for a hand is either going to pull you down with them and the people above you are never going to be like, hey, haha, you're down there, or whatever. They're always going to try to help you.

0:04:57 - (Kevin Duboe): Right?

0:04:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): And it's always a different perspective. And when you brought up making decisions because Alex Hormosi said the same thing, it's kind of like the faster you can make a decision, the better, because you're not wasting that time just idling and you're kind of just. Either you do or you.

0:05:11 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:05:12 - (Tawni Nguyen): So how do you see that growth? How do you make your decisions in terms of your health and fitness? Do you put yourself on a routine or is it something that you're still developing each day to be better?

0:05:27 - (Kevin Duboe): I think it's more of a lifestyle for me now at this point because I don't go to the gym or eat healthy just to look a certain way, you know, or else like that. That doesn't really last long for me if I have a deeper meaning. Meaning I want to live like a very extensive life where I can be there for my family, for my grandkids. I can be a role model for my sisters and for everybody around me, then that makes it more purposeful for what I do every day. But in terms of routine, I have a certain diet.

0:06:01 - (Kevin Duboe): I also got trainers involved, so I can help me elevate myself. So that's why I'm big on mentors and any area of life. If you want to fast track. I got really good trainers around me that help me get a better understanding about my body, and then that led me. Now that I have a more well understanding of my body and how my body works, then I can have more control of my decisions. And I know the outcomes of certain things. Like if I eat this certain type of food now, I'm going to feel really good. Or if I eat this type of food now, I'm going to feel really bad.

0:06:36 - (Kevin Duboe): So when I'm making decisions about food or fitness, I just attach it to a bigger purpose and then that allows me to make the decisions easier, too, and who I need around me.

0:06:49 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I like that you brought it up that you don't work out just to look a certain way anymore. Because I think that's like level one of working is people set such a high expectation on the superficial changes that's supposed to happen to your body on this physiological aspect. Not just that now I say I joke around, but I'm like, if I don't work out, my mental health is shit.

0:07:08 - (Kevin Duboe): But something would be like that 100%. That's literally one of the main reasons I go is, like, so I can get mental clarity, so I just feel good and I go in the mornings, so that way it's a great start to my day. If I can get a win at the beginning of the day, it makes it so much easier throughout the day. If I have to make 50 calls or whatever it is, I'm already winning throughout the day. It just makes it easier versus me.

0:07:36 - (Kevin Duboe): And it's like keeping your promises to yourself. You're building self confidence throughout the day with these little wins. And it's like, if I tell myself I'm going to do XYZ, I go do it. You're able to develop that self trust and that self confidence, and then that leads you to now, if I want to go say, I tell myself I've done that consistently for six months or whatever, how much more likely am I going to be able to say, like, oh, I'm going to go create this business?

0:08:05 - (Kevin Duboe): You have already all these wins and this trust within yourself where when you go tell yourself you're going to go do it, you're going to go do it. And that's what high achievers have. They just have impeccable records of self accountability and self trust.

0:08:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. You feel better, too?

0:08:23 - (Kevin Duboe): 100%, yeah.

0:08:24 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I think tying into it because you said you got trainers and stuff for your physical health, obviously. How does that tie into your business? Do you use that financial expense as. Because people invest more into something that they have financial ties in, like, hey, I put 10,000 here, so I better get $10,000 worth of value out of it.

0:08:44 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:08:45 - (Tawni Nguyen): How has that integrated you investing in yourself and your physical well being? How has that tied into your business?

0:08:52 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, for sure. So it's kind of funny. One of my biggest months I had as a lender and stuff was during my competition, which I was just so disciplined because of, because I was doing competition at the time with my training, with my food, it just poured into my other areas of life, including business. So I thought that was funny. But, yeah, I invest on a yearly basis into either events coaches, and it just allows you to, especially in this day and age, it just allows you to get into in front of people that are way ahead of you or worry exactly where you want to be and learn from that person versus trying to do it on your own.

0:09:36 - (Kevin Duboe): I think it's egotistical for someone to have, like, let's just say $5,000 and they don't want to go pay someone to go help them versus trying to figure them out, figure it out themselves.

0:09:48 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, because you're buying the shortcut, which is the time. Not the shortcut to the money, but the shortcut of just compressing that time.

0:09:56 - (Kevin Duboe): Exactly.

0:09:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): To get to wherever it is that you want to go.

0:09:58 - (Kevin Duboe): Right, yeah, exactly. And you're being humble by saying, like, hey, here's my money, I'm willing to learn. And what you have to say to this other person.

0:10:07 - (Tawni Nguyen): What was the biggest thing that you have to overcome with losing your friends? Was it the negative comments? Is it something that they're giving you certain vibes?

0:10:19 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:10:19 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because you said, wherever you need to go next, people will be there. But when you lose out on those friends or when you have to cut out those friends, what was that thing, like, that mental thing? Like you said, you had some blocks and some limiting beliefs. Do you feel like after you've let go of those friends, that you freed yourself completely and just not give those people control over your mental space?

0:10:44 - (Kevin Duboe): How I felt right after making that decision? I think the tension or the battle within is realizing you want to be like friends still. But then you're trying to decide. So, like, you're in this kind of, like, almost in between stage. But the faster you decide to stick to this certain path that you want to, the more peace you'll have with it. And as soon as you really do decide how quickly people that are also trying to do the same thing that you are doing or on the same path, you find those people and those people become your new friends.

0:11:23 - (Kevin Duboe): And then now you guys are more aligned because of what certain values and certain goals that you guys have. And then that's way more reassuring.

0:11:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, because you said you want to tie purpose and meaning into everything that you do so that you can actually be there generationally speaking. Right, because you don't want to be 80 years old and you can't pick up your grandkid.

0:11:42 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly.

0:11:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like your hip breaks or something, and you fall on the floor and you can't get up. Like those commercials of how poorly, I guess we were conditioned to treat our body and that now health and fitness, if you take that as a pillar, we obviously have the same pillars. It's like, I love you, but my health is my number one thing. Because the money, the business, the relationships can't really come if you're in a shitty place mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually.

0:12:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): Obviously, if you're falling apart, you don't take care of yourself. You can't really pour into other people as well.

0:12:16 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly.

0:12:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): So I think that's a really important way that you kind of put perspective into my head. It's like, hey, if you add meaning to it, because there's a lot of people that I think in their 20s especially, they're like, I'm finding myself. I'm this, I'm that. And I know I went through the same things, like, towards later in my 20s because I'm like, my life doesn't have value. Besides, I'm just chasing money. I'm on this hamster wheel, right?

0:12:39 - (Tawni Nguyen): I'm falling apart. I'm just spiritually kind of, like, broken. And I just don't have really any real meaning or any meaningful relationships to where I feel like I'm on a purpose driven path.

0:12:50 - (Kevin Duboe): Right. Yeah.

0:12:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): And when you brought up alignment, it's really powerful because a lot of people, that's a lot of terms that I think people kind of throw around. Yeah, I'm in a season of alignment, but they're not really in tuned of what it is that they want or trying to find their higher calling or their purpose. How do you suggest? Let's just say we identify with those meanings or callings or purpose. How do you identify yourself within those words?

0:13:22 - (Kevin Duboe): I think I'm still, I guess, like, discovering it day by day because you're in her 20s. I'm just, like, learning. I think I used to focus a lot on outcomes and future, which is great you want to do that. But what I found to be more rewarding is the daily process. So I find purpose with just even waking up at a certain time, drinking a certain amount of water when I wake up, going to the gym, journaling, these are just like things I'm telling myself I'm going to go do and I do them. And it just gives me confidence to go throughout the day versus trying to focus so much on this outcome, because we really can't control outcomes, but we can control our daily process.

0:14:09 - (Kevin Duboe): In atomic habits. That book is phenomenal, but it describes all these high level achievers. They don't actually focus on the outcome even though they really, really want it. They just focus on the daily habits and the daily process that actually ends up getting the result that they want.

0:14:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:14:26 - (Kevin Duboe): And that's what I try to just focus on. And right now, I guess, in my stage of life, I'm just focused on those steps related to work, related to my health and fitness, and just becoming a better role model for myself and for the people around myself. And something that you mentioned is it's hard for me to listen to someone that maybe is very rich financially but they just trash their bodies. I just won't listen to the person because you can make a lot of money, but if you're choosing to trash your body and you're really just lying to yourself if you think not being healthy is okay.

0:15:10 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:15:11 - (Kevin Duboe): So I'm also just very specific now with the people that I choose to listen to, and that's something that I think a lot of people will easily are influenced with the people on social media because they have a nice car or they have XYZ, and they think that's what they want. But at the end of the day, is this someone that you truly would want to replace your life with? Do they have the health lifestyle that you want? Do they have the family that you want?

0:15:37 - (Kevin Duboe): Do they have the finances that you want? Yeah, that's something that I did wrong in my early twenty s, I think is like, I would just listen to everybody and not really understand who that person is.

0:15:48 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I actually really like that take because also in my 20s, it's all about money. And what I didn't realize until I was, like, 30 that taking care of your health is actually the highest form of self respect, which at the time. I mean, during the 20s, like, all the drinking, the drugs, and all of that stuff. And I'm like, what we call, like, self sabotaging. Right?

0:16:10 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:16:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because you are lowering yourself from the potential that you could have.

0:16:16 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:16:16 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because you don't allow yourself to be at your full capacity. You can't perform at your highest capacity. Because, one. I was always hungover. I'm always anxious because I'm hungover. And a lot of that kind of ties into the limitations that I had, because it's much easier to choose to drink and feel shitty about myself and to just perform and still try to reach for perfectionistic tendencies and all of these overachieving things. But the levers really there because my foundation was all wrong. And it wasn't until I took care of myself. Like, I wish I would have done that in my 20s, but that's something that I had to learn the hard way.

0:16:48 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:16:49 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because there's always a lesson. There's always tuition that you have to pay, and I paid with my health.

0:16:53 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:16:53 - (Tawni Nguyen): And until I took those steps and until I realigned myself to people that are on the same path with the lifestyle choices. I really like that you said that. Would you replace your life with this person? Is because people are always so miserable when they're looking on social media, at other people's highlight reels, they're seeing the finances, the cars, the girls, whatever that they'd idolize or whatever social media says it's cool to have.

0:17:16 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:17:16 - (Tawni Nguyen): And they don't look at the back end, which is really hard to measure someone's happiness and holistic health outside of what they pose.

0:17:23 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, that's a great point.

0:17:24 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:17:25 - (Kevin Duboe): What was the decision on when you made that shift? To be like, I need to respect myself. I need to treat my body well. When did you start making that change?

0:17:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): Officially? Been sober for seven months. But I tried to make those changes last year because I'm like, what is the point of me spending thousands of dollars a year going to all these self development conferences and all these things and trying to work on my mindset if I'm doing the same things, I'm just buying time and I'm buying social activities around drinking. Because what happens when you go to conferences? It's after parties, after parties, after parties, and it's strip clubs and all of these things. I'm still doing the exact same things.

0:18:03 - (Tawni Nguyen): But until one day I woke up and it was. I think it was last July when the hermosis was there at Wealthcon or whatever it was called future flipper, that I was hungover and I almost missed it. And I'm like, why did I just spend a couple thousand dollars when I'm hungover and I can't even enjoy it?

0:18:18 - (Kevin Duboe): Right?

0:18:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): But from that moment on, I started picking up the pattern. I'm like, I don't want to wake up like this anymore, right? But until I realized it was an addiction, that I created my life around just social drinking, that I realized what I was lacking. And until I gave up that one thing, I got my entire life back. Like, my health is on point. I love being able to cook for myself. I do the things that I enjoy, which people call boring. And now I idolize being boring because, like you said, it's the structure.

0:18:46 - (Tawni Nguyen): I didn't know how much structure could feel so good. And you're not fun anymore. All you do is this. I'm like, good. 90% of my life is me. It's my control. And the 10% you just kind of leave to the universe, right? Like, I'm all yours. I surrender. I'll let go. I'll let go of all the vices that, like you said. And I think that moment kind of changed when I started having better conversations with people.

0:19:10 - (Tawni Nguyen): And it really just opened my eyes to this new world of how to live a life that's truly fulfilling and happy and talk to people that want the same things. And to the people that are still in the drinking culture, like, no offense, you do what you do, right?

0:19:30 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, I have no judgment with whatever everybody else does. I just have a certain standard for myself.

0:19:36 - (Tawni Nguyen): That's it.

0:19:37 - (Kevin Duboe): And you can take that however you want, but I just feel like you were also just aligned with what you were truly seeking for. You were going to these development, personal development things, and then you actually went and applied that right to your own life, and that just made it way more real for you.

0:19:54 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, it was the self awareness that I got in the last two years that compounded into the one month of me opening my eyes, like, kind of waking up to the life that I created for myself. I'm like, what is the one element that I truly want to remove that could change everything? Like, you think it's the friends, you think it's all of that stuff. You think you'll lose your social life. I actually don't.

0:20:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): I think I have a better social life now. It's because it's not revolved around just getting fucked up and getting bottle service or buying a bunch of drugs or whatever. Right? I don't know. It just doesn't really appeal to me.

0:20:29 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, it's not as meaningful, I think, as you said, poor.

0:20:33 - (Tawni Nguyen): I can spend $5,000 doing that, or I can spend $5,000 going to a conference and actually meeting people, like mentors that can help me be like, hey, I need to make this business, and this is where I'm fucking up. How can you help me, right? Do you have any advice or just be around people that just make your problems that you have, like, your huge problem seem so small and so possible? Because I think the biggest mindset shift that I had was when I was talking about my old friends, just basic real estate stuff, and they were just like, oh, that's so boring.

0:21:06 - (Tawni Nguyen): Take a shot and do all of these things. I'm like, no, I find these things, like, intriguing.

0:21:10 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, it's like 90. The majority of the stuff that leads to success is going to be boring. It's like, after this, I got to make, like, 50 more calls when I get to my office. Nobody wants to go do that, but I'm willing to go do that. And even if I don't feel like doing it, or if I do, it doesn't matter. It has to get done. And those are the type of habits that have to be created.

0:21:33 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I really kind of like digging deep into just the everyday, foundational stuff that we call boring. But social media also highlights like overnight success. And then now it's kind of slowly coming out. It's like, yeah, the overnight success takes them like 20 years, but if you really look at their habits every single day, this is exactly what they did for 20 years. Are you willing to put yourself through that sacrifice of losing out on everything else?

0:21:57 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:21:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): When really you're just paving the road to a different life that you said you want and you have to let go of everything else. And I think with health and fitness, when you're in the gym and do you have motivational speech going on or how does your gym routine work out look like differ to a normal person?

0:22:15 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, actually I don't get to think about it that much. But now you're bringing it up. I already have a little routine where I have some of my self events before I go to the gym, that kind of thing. But I think as soon as I step into the gym, one, I know the workouts that I'm doing, which helps out a lot, meaning I pretty much stick to a three month workout routine. So I do it for three months and then I switch my workouts.

0:22:42 - (Kevin Duboe): And really what I like about this is that once you're in a routine of doing the same workout, now that my body knows what exactly what I'm going to do every single day, now it's more about how am I going into the workout, meaning how intentional am I about the reps that I'm doing? How intentional am I about my self talk? Because I do weekly gym things with other people to get workouts in. And some people when they're at the gym, they're distracted or they're talking about something else or talking about something negative.

0:23:17 - (Kevin Duboe): For me, when I'm going to the gym, I want to be intentional about my workout and also making sure I'm giving myself the positive self talk that I need in order to go throughout my day and have a winning day. Because I wake up tired just like everybody else. I wake up sometimes not wanting to go to the gym, not wanting to wake up. But when I get to the gym and I pretty much work on myself at the gym mentally, yeah, I'm working out and I'm doing those things. But I'm also getting a lot more positive self talk by the end of the workout, I feel like incredible where I'm like, man, I'm the man. I can conquer the day. Whatever I need to go do, send a positive message to people. Whatever it is we already know, like science, we have all these endorphin rushed after our workouts as well. So we're at a very high frequency.

0:24:12 - (Kevin Duboe): But mainly I stick to a workout and I just make sure I'm intentional. And I think a lot of people are just very distracted when they go to the gym. I do listen to music, sometimes I don't, sometimes I do, sometimes they listen to a podcast, just depending how I feel. Sometimes it's music, but it's just about being intentional.

0:24:30 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:24:30 - (Kevin Duboe): And that way if I do that in my workout, I can be intentional throughout the rest of my day, too.

0:24:35 - (Tawni Nguyen): I think that's a really important factor is focus because I think the mind muscle connection thing that more and more people are talking about, it's connecting to the breath and it's connecting to you and just staying aligned in that rep, like eight reps and ten reps can feel totally different if I'm just like.

0:25:00 - (Kevin Duboe): Just moving or trying to, like you said, muscle mind connection with your actual muscles. I close my eyes pretty much the whole time during my workout. Really like 70% of the time when I'm really working out, I'm closing my eyes actually just imagining me doing the rep, but I'm focused on my muscles contracting and stuff. And that way there's no distractions.

0:25:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): I've never thought of that. Maybe I don't trust myself enough.

0:25:30 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, I've been training for almost like twelve years. But yeah, that muscle mind connection is a little bit different when you close your eyes because now you don't have any sensory all. You're just focused on like a squat. A squat I will. But something where I'm seated or anything like that, where I'm not going to hurt myself. Yeah, you can do that. And a lot of the top athletes do that.

0:25:55 - (Tawni Nguyen): I call it for lateral raises. It's like the hardest for girls because we're not built to want to work out our shoulders and chest. Yeah, but I think those and back, like upper is now like my favorite just because that was my weakest point. I think that's going to be the perfect eye closing thing. I feel like every time I'm doing lateral raises, I'm like, this is when I fight my demons.

0:26:14 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly. The perfect one. I always do with lateral raises.

0:26:19 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, because I'm just envisioning it now. I'm like, this is when I fight the demons, all the negative self talk kind of comes out.

0:26:24 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly. And that's like the battle. That's what I like about the workout is like, you usually get all this self talk that's within you, but you get to choose how you want to battle it. I'll start envisioning how I want my body to look, how I want my day to look, how I want my life to look while I'm working out. So that way our brain goes to what it's familiar with. So if I can familiarize myself with the type of life that I want or the type of body I want, I'm going to start attracting that.

0:26:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Because they say that it's the same frequency. As you mentioned earlier, the higher you raise your frequency, which is now that I'm hearing, you're speaking positivity into the affirmations of the things that you want to create. Because for us to get into flow state and creation state, it's a different level that you have to be, right?

0:27:14 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:27:15 - (Tawni Nguyen): What was the biggest limiting belief that you always have around your negative self talk that you had to break.

0:27:21 - (Kevin Duboe): I think more recently it's just been like my self sabotage, to be honest. I was writing down hesitation the other day because I felt like a lot of parts of my life I would hesitate on business or really just my self belief. And that's why keeping the promises to myself is so vital, because that builds my self confidence. Self sabotage. Meaning, if I was doing well in business, then all of a sudden I would slow down just because I had a good month or these things versus even my body. I've done that.

0:27:57 - (Kevin Duboe): I've gone through cycles where I do really extreme type of workouts and challenges, and then I kind of go off for a little bit. Really? Right now, it's just like making sure I can maintain a high level. That's what I want. And I think that's really based off my self confidence. Because we wouldn't self sabotage if we didn't truly believe that's what we deserve. If I truly say I want to have a high level of business and high level of fitness, but then I have these lapses in my character, then that's self sabotage. Meaning at a certain level, I believe that's what I'm worth.

0:28:39 - (Tawni Nguyen): I see.

0:28:40 - (Kevin Duboe): So it's just about increasing my self worth, which is just keeping the promises to myself.

0:28:45 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Let's just say if you skip a workout on purpose, not the intentional rest day.

0:28:51 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:28:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): And during that self sabotage, you'd be like, oh, it's okay, it's my free day, I'll just snack.

0:28:57 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:28:58 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I think that's how I identify self sabotaging, as now is because now that I'm eating better, I actually don't have cravings on junk food and all of that stuff anymore because I've reconditioned and rewired my brain, hopefully to not crave for that. And when I know I'm reaching for it, there's something else that I'm purposely trying to avoid, which is how I'm creating a distraction for myself.

0:29:20 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, right.

0:29:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): So I'm always like, oh, I'm so creative, and I'll find tasks for me to do so that I don't do that thing that I said I'm going to do. So, for example, if I'm like, I'm going to edit this video and I'll be like, oh, but the laundry. So I'll do the laundry. And then I end up in the pantry, and I start cleaning the pantry and I end up in the fridge. I'm like, oh, I need a snack. And in that moment, I wake up and I'm like, fuck am I doing?

0:29:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): Why?

0:29:42 - (Kevin Duboe): And I think it happens to all of us. It's about correcting.

0:29:47 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And I think it's just giving yourself grace and just kindness to develop that self awareness, too, because in that moment, I recognize I'm like, oh, I'm purposely avoiding this. I either, one, don't want to do it, or two, I'm not going to enjoy it because ADHD brain, like, you have to be stimulated enough for you to want to do the task.

0:30:05 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:30:05 - (Tawni Nguyen): What is it about this task that's so uncomfortable that I don't want to do it? And you said you make like, 50 calls a day. After my third call, I'm like, man, I'm tired of getting rejected.

0:30:15 - (Kevin Duboe): Exactly.

0:30:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): Is that how you're sourcing your leads for your business? Mostly through cold calling.

0:30:24 - (Kevin Duboe): I work with a lot of great real estate agents as well, so some of them do open houses on the weekend. So any of those people that come by their leads, I'll get sent those and I'll call those. So I have kind of like a list of past leads. So I get new leads that way here and there. Social media, like, every once in a while, I've gotten a few people hit me up on social media, and then that's pretty much it. My real estate partners, social media, we do have a call center, but that's mainly for other loan officers.

0:30:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. How do you deal with the fear of rejection? Because for me, I know cold calling. That was the first, I think, phase that I had to break at. One, talking to strangers.

0:31:08 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:31:08 - (Tawni Nguyen): And two, getting rejected.

0:31:10 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, for sure. No, I was terrible at phone calls when I started. I was 1920 years old. And I was trying to sell people on mortgages, right when I was 1920 years old. So I have no idea what I'm doing. And I went through the same thing. I would do like ten calls and I'd be like, all right, that was good enough. I don't want to get rejected anymore. And then I would go back and do a few more calls. And then one day I was like, okay, I'm not going to get better if I'm just doing ten calls at a time. So what I would start doing is I would do as many calls I could. It was like 8 hours a day of calls. I would do like just calls. Yeah.

0:31:46 - (Kevin Duboe): And it was on auto dialer. So I'd probably would do like 200 calls, like a day. Like 150 to 200 calls a day. And what I would do at the end of the day is I would go and listen to all those calls now. I would listen to myself. Well, how did I sound? What did I say? What could I correct? And I would just start writing those down. And I would write down like, okay, I said way too many times here, I need to correct that. So I put it like sticking out for the next week and just make sure I don't say when I'm talking.

0:32:14 - (Kevin Duboe): And then if it was, hey, I need to have more positivity in my tone or whatever. Okay, I'll work on that. And then I literally, just slowly, within 90 days, my calls got a tremendous amount better. Just because I was willing to look at my own calls and not be, not judgmental to myself. Just look at it and be like, okay, this is what I need to improve on, right? And then I would also tell myself what I did do good on, right? So that way I'm getting myself the right feedback and also training as well, where I would watch someone else do training and teach and that would help.

0:32:50 - (Kevin Duboe): So that's how I was able to develop, just being able to cold call anybody. And obviously that's a great skill set now. So back then I was like, I hated it. I did not like doing it because.

0:33:01 - (Tawni Nguyen): That'S something that people don't talk about. It's one of the rejection because they're like, oh, just get over and do it. But I never actually considered relistening to your calls. And you went through the fucking extremes to recalls, you listen to them. And it's a really nice way to frame self awareness, is that you have to study yourself in a way, right? Like, that's how you develop self awareness. It's called self development. Because you have to study yourself for sure.

0:33:25 - (Kevin Duboe): And I didn't even really know what I was. I just knew, like, I wanted to get better. And looking back now. Yeah, it is like you're just able to look at yourself and reflect and want to change and actually make a change. I sound totally different now than I did back then, making calls. So you can literally change the person you are just by reflecting and creating new habits and just doing something different.

0:33:48 - (Kevin Duboe): Because you can make all these calls, for example. But if you don't have something new to say or if you don't have the right feedback, how are you going to really change even if you do 200 more calls than I do? Yeah, you got to either get better or do more.

0:34:05 - (Tawni Nguyen): Right? Holy shit. I'm so sitting on that. Wow. Yeah. Because there is, like, a road to self mastery is first understanding yourself, and you're just so calm and collected that it's almost like a serial murder vibe.

0:34:23 - (Kevin Duboe): I love it.

0:34:25 - (Tawni Nguyen): How did you work on yourself? Energetically speaking, right. In terms of mindset and all of these things that we say, like, we can't build self development on a shaky foundation.

0:34:36 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:34:36 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because you can stack all the good habits. Like, people can do all the good things they want, but they're rocky somewhere on the bottom.

0:34:42 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah. And that rocky is really just them themselves. Right? It's their own identity, their own self worth. And I'm still working on myself every day. I still mess up, but I just try to focus on, again my daily habits and my promises that I keep to myself.

0:34:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:34:57 - (Kevin Duboe): But I don't know. I guess when I was in college, I remember someone gave me the ten x book, right? And I started listening to it as an audiobook while I was in class. And it was like my first book that kind of opened up my mind of, like, oh, I can do whatever I want, meaning I can go create a life that I want. I don't have to go to college. I don't have to do these things. And that kind of really led me to the path of wanting to go do real estate. And then through that, I met a lot of great people.

0:35:31 - (Kevin Duboe): And that just kind of opened up your mind, right. You started seeing other things. You start seeing these massive mansions that I've never seen before, and I'm like, oh, this is like a reality.

0:35:39 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:35:41 - (Kevin Duboe): But I don't know. I think the fitness thing helps, right. That's my foundation for me because it's like, the way I do self development within myself.

0:35:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:35:52 - (Kevin Duboe): Some people like to meditate or I don't know whatever it is, but I think through physical activity, because you're putting yourself in a position to have to go through something hard, it just creates all these attributes of mental toughness. It creates, obviously, like, a healthy body, but it also creates discipline, which can lead to other areas in your life. So I think it's one of the fastest ways.

0:36:21 - (Kevin Duboe): And something that people can grasp on quickly is health and fitness to start off their journey and whatever they want is growth. Because one you can see results in, like 30, 60, 90 days right away with the business, you might not see a result until, like, five years, ten years down the road. I think that's why fitness is such a great first start and a great foundation.

0:36:43 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. I love that you brought up the ten x, because I think a lot of people either love or hate grant.

0:36:49 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:36:50 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because he's obnoxious and he's out there, but his philosophy worked. Just do whatever you think you got to do. Just do ten times more of it.

0:36:57 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:36:58 - (Tawni Nguyen): Then it's all about consistency and developing those things that just keep stacking, for sure. So you read that book, and what was the ideology behind financial freedom that made you make that shift? Like, what was it about financial freedom? Or how would you describe going down the path of financial freedom to someone that's like, what? What is that?

0:37:20 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah. Because I'm not there yet, but I just feel like real estate. I was always attracted to real estate, and the concept of, you can own these properties and that will generate you income, and it's like, this is your income source versus you going in and clocking in at a job. So I just feel like, for me, the financial freedom was very. Just attractive. Like, I think most people are. They want that type of being able to still generate income and live the lifestyle that they choose to live without having to be at a job and having to work certain hours or do certain things that they truly don't want to do. So I don't think we're meant to do that. So I think as humans, we're meant to have this type of freedom and live a certain way and also create.

0:38:11 - (Kevin Duboe): Be in creation versus being in a rat race and just kind of like cruise control throughout life.

0:38:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): The autopilot Hampton.

0:38:19 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah. You just see that so much. And then as you start kind of, like, even breaking out of the mindset, you see how many people are just in that every single day, and at the end of the day, that's their choice.

0:38:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Because I think a lot of people have a negative connotation every time they hear frugality as a philosophy. They just think, frugality, frugality, like being frugal, okay? And they're just like, oh, so you're just cheap. I'm like, no, I spend money where it counts. Like, I spend money on my self investments, my food. Yeah, that's the biggest thing. It's because that's the nutrition that I'm feeding my body so I can go create with my brain.

0:38:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): I can go destroy my muscles.

0:38:59 - (Kevin Duboe): It's through food.

0:39:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's the energy, because money is energy. And I turn that, well, money is currency. I turn that currency into energy in terms of nutrition. And I think that's just a really funny way to structure frugality. It's just like, spend money where you have value, and that's it, right? And I think it's just before I understood that concept of financial freedom, I always thought it was a number, but it's not. Because if I didn't really truly understand my lifestyle and the lifestyle I wanted to live, it's because I was just so conditioned by all the people around me, right? They were making half a meal, 1.2.

0:39:36 - (Tawni Nguyen): But they spent all of it. They just live so lavishly. And I look at their relationships, kind of like you said. I'm like, I don't really want to mirror their life because they don't have one. Like a happy home to where their kids want to spend time with them. And the husband and wife is just superficial on the outside. Like, they'll take Facebook pictures, but are they really in love? Are they happy? And I'm like, maybe I am an old school, traditional romantic to where I do want that. I want that fulfilling life to where my kids want to talk to me and my partner. It's an actual life supporting partner, not just someone that signed the piece of paper with and buys a home and do all of these very superficial things.

0:40:13 - (Tawni Nguyen): I want to have a meaningful conversation about the future and live on a farm if I want to or take time off if I want to, and I don't have to be stuck into whatever this trap.

0:40:24 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, sure.

0:40:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I think a lot of the people that I've talked to in the recent days are like, how do you create a lifestyle like that? Because it sounds so woo woo, like social media. How do you feel about lifestyle creation to where you feel free to do what you choose and live on your own terms?

0:40:44 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, I think you can have that freedom as it is with yourself. Meaning having the freedom to say what you want to say, having the freedom to do what you want to do. You might not be there financially, but it doesn't mean you can't take actions that represent freedom. Meaning if I'm going to go work like 10 hours, to me, some people might know that's not freedom. I'm like, well, to me, it's like I'm building a life of freedom, so I get to enjoy that process.

0:41:17 - (Kevin Duboe): But I'm like a workaholic. So I think for most people, maybe they don't want to work, but I like to work. I enjoy it. I feel fulfilled when I'm working. And then some people are not like that, but just find whatever you truly want to be doing and just go for it. But I don't know. I find meaning in work. I think we're meant to do a certain level of work. It's not just about kicking your feet up in the sand and relaxing.

0:41:54 - (Kevin Duboe): I rarely see people enjoying their lives doing that. It's more about serving other people. Serving yourself, but serving other people as well in order to help other people. I feel like the most fulfilled when I'm helping someone do their first workout or helping someone educate someone about their finances, about a home and buying their first home. I feel way more fulfilled doing that than just trying to watch. I can't even watch tv.

0:42:23 - (Kevin Duboe): I'm just not that person. Yeah.

0:42:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): And what I'm hearing is that we attach ourselves to this american dream, which is buying the first home. But there's actually people like you that actually care about people. Because I have a lot of friends also in the lending industry to where people are just a commission to them.

0:42:43 - (Kevin Duboe): Oh, yeah, right.

0:42:44 - (Tawni Nguyen): So like two, three, whatever percent that I actually don't know right now. So they just attach other people to that commission that they get so that they can bill, spend their money. And is there anything that you wish people would ask you more that they don't know about you by just looking at you on social media or just.

0:43:03 - (Kevin Duboe): I think I'm more of a deeper person than most people probably think. But I like to think deeply about things. I do like to help people. I'm trying to do that more with, through my content, with the things that help me, which is like my fitness, which is like financing financial education. But I think maybe sometimes I can come off really not stern. I don't know. Maybe I am very hard on myself. So I do tend to have that tendency towards other people because when I see someone else, I see a better version of them.

0:43:47 - (Kevin Duboe): Sometimes that's good, sometimes that's bad, because maybe they don't want that, but that's on them. But I just want the people around me to be doing better, having a healthier lifestyle, and just feel support. I think there's a very superficial type of support out there through social media, just like regular text messages or whatever it is, which is fine, but I want people around me to feel like they have someone they can actually trust and who has their back and real support.

0:44:21 - (Kevin Duboe): A lot of that is not really. I think it's kind of like fake a lot of times. Like, fake support.

0:44:29 - (Tawni Nguyen): Oh, you mean not that. Let's fucking go. What if a ship. Apologies. Instagram, right?

0:44:33 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly.

0:44:34 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. I think the humanity in us on social media is always reduced down to number of comments, likes, and all of these algorithmic things that we attach our self worth to. And a lot of that is also external validation. Right. Because you're like, why am I putting out content? No one likes it. But sometimes, honestly, have you ever liked something? You should still even look at it. You're just like, oh, I just want to support them, but I don't have the 30 seconds to all the time actually look at the content.

0:44:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): So I really do like that you actually want something meaningful and for people to actually get value from what you're trying to provide, because if you love something, you would do it for free, which is content. Right. Like, you're not charging people to take up 30 seconds of their time.

0:45:10 - (Kevin Duboe): Right.

0:45:10 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I think I find that also really meaningful because it's really hard to distinguish who your friends are. And that's why the circle gets smaller and smaller and everything's kind of like a dot. Like, who can actually be there for me? Like, if I was thrown in jail, who do I actually call? Who do I trust? And having that background as a lender is kind of hard because you're so structurally tied. And I do see what you mean by, like, you come off more stern.

0:45:33 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, right. I'm disciplined. This is how it goes type of thing.

0:45:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So people can misread that. Serious.

0:45:41 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly. It's very serious. And I am for the majority of times, but with my close friends, I love to go work out or I love going to car shows and things like that. So there's things that I'm super passionate about. But I do think you should take life seriously.

0:46:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So, Lethana, something like, what do you want to do? How do you want your life to look like once you reach your financial freedom? What does life look like for you?

0:46:12 - (Kevin Duboe): I think I'm just going to be trying to help people. That's kind of what I want to do now. But everything that I learn to do as I grow, I just want to be able to teach others the same when I become a certain, just doesn't even have to be a certain level, but as I grow, even now, I can still help people with fitness and all these other things and finances. So I just think I'll find more worth in what I do with the people I help.

0:46:41 - (Kevin Duboe): And I like doing that. I do. So I would just be doing at a bigger scale. I don't necessarily have a certain degree outcome of what exactly what it's going.

0:46:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): To look like or how many people.

0:46:53 - (Kevin Duboe): Like, how many people I think how it's going to. I really don't tie myself into the exact detail of that, but again, I just take the pride in the steps that I take every single day and then I think that will take care of itself.

0:47:07 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I really respect that discipline that you have because I always say, like, if we can change just one life and help somebody up or just change their life to where they are happy about where they're at, that's one less soul that we're going to lose, right?

0:47:21 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah.

0:47:22 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because there's so many people living in misery or they end up taking that route to where they end their life because they're so miserable. And I think that's the biggest pain point that I've had talking to a lot of people is they're so miserable and the only way out is out, and that's just something that we don't really talk about enough.

0:47:38 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, for sure, yes.

0:47:39 - (Tawni Nguyen): I just want to acknowledge your service to others and the fact that you don't have to be at a certain financial status to help. Like, you can help at any level.

0:47:49 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, I think we're called to do that at a certain level, but at the same time, you do want to continue to level up as well in order to really show true growth. And not just, at least for me, that's the people that I want to be around is like, they're always continually growing in all areas in life, not just one area that your standard is.

0:48:07 - (Tawni Nguyen): A lot higher, has access to you.

0:48:09 - (Kevin Duboe): Yeah, exactly.

0:48:14 - (Tawni Nguyen): Anything else you want to say? No, we're all like deep and introspective.

0:48:20 - (Kevin Duboe): Super.

0:48:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): We went like hella inward on that one. I was like, man.

0:48:28 - (Kevin Duboe): I just want people to life and be the best versions of be the best version. I think fitness is like a great way to start. If you don't know where to start, don't worry about finances. Just keep the promises to yourself and treat your body right. And that already will build enough momentum to lead you into other areas in life.

0:48:47 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Cool. Dude, thanks for being here today and acknowledge you for your time. I know you're busy. You got, like, 50 calls after this.

0:48:53 - (Kevin Duboe): It's all good. I'll knock it out in an hour.

0:48:55 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So hopefully you guys got some valuable insights from Kevin. You can find him on Instagram.

0:49:01 - (Kevin Duboe): Instagram is my main source. Kevin Duboe. But we'll put it in there. We'll put it in there somewhere. Yeah. That's where, mainly, you can find me.

0:49:10 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Cool. So my name is Tawni. You can find me on IG at tawnisaurus. And stay fit. And stay frugal. Peace.